Fashionably, most of my friends back home have children. Healthy, beautiful, strong babies. And- since we’re talking about Eastern Europe- completely wholesome babies, with their foreskins still attached to the respectively appropriate parts. Apparently unfashionably so.
That is why last why, when somebody brought it up as a thing to plan for their unborn son (you know- nursery? check. Stroller? Check. Diapers? Check. Midwife? Check. College fund? Check. Clipping off some extra skin? Still to arrange), I got curious.
There were several people visiting, sitting at the kitchen table and we were all listening to a talk about the last minute things that still need planning. All good, fuzzy and exciting. And then somebody mentioned the penis thing- which would have gone unnoticed save for my European brain and my big mouth uttering the dreaded word. “WHY?”
There were no hidden thoughts, no value judgements passed, no secret intentions behind my question. I just wanted to know why they thought circumcision has to be done. I wouldn’t argue with religion, but what if that is out of the question? I know there’s been plenty of research that proved no medical advantage to having a naked dick. I know that sexually, the extra inch does not make any notable difference (um, I really do know. All my (few) boyfriends before were European-born, therefore fully hangin’, get my drill? And although I ended up marrying my perfect man, I’m pretty sure it wasn’t because of his circumcised weenie). So then, why?
The conversation fired up, and I was surprised to see how seriously opinionated everyone in the room was. We went through tradition and the fact that earlier heals better than later. But when it came to ugliness (lucky for us, none in our generation will ever have to sleep with “that”, I was thinking in my head) or sense of inclusion (really? THAT’s what he’ll need to worry about in a room full of other dudes? That THEY don’t like his penis?), I felt like I was witnessing double standards in the making.
The more I heard, the more I was having a deja-vu. The very same people would have no problem shunning the promoters of superficial esthetic values (for example, the media influencers who decide a girl needs to look anorexic to be beautiful). They openly criticize the mothers who encourage their daughters to be living dolls, or pageant queens, at the expense of their self confidence. They think natural is cool. And I agree with all of this. And yet, they fired up over an unborn’s baby foreskin, and decided almost unanimously that the first girl/boy little baby will sleep with some years from now will be superficial and therefore will get too scared of his turtle- and back off.
I say this (not that my opinion matters, but we all have one): let the kid be and, more importantly, let his penis be. If some day he’ll decide naked is better that not, help him have the clipping done. But don’t chop now for the sake of 15-years-from-now standards. People change, trends change- you never know what girls will be into in 2030.
Plus, no turtle stays in the turtleneck if a hot someone is coming close enough for a look… Trust me.
(You can now follow me on Bloglovin, too.)